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Posted on January 31st, 2008 by Raj.
Categories: Media & Entertainment, History & Politics, Humor & Pop Culture, Storytelling.
Another one stolen from Raj Beri’s Unfit2Print:
In a sign of solidarity with their Writer’s Guild of America brethren, the nation’s top political speechwriters went on strike early Thursday morning. The move comes at the worst possible time for the Democratic and Republican candidates vying for their Parties Presidential nominations. The Head of the Political Speechwriters Association (PSA) commented on the decision, which caught most DC insiders off guard, saying, “We thought it was the appropriate action at this point. We don’t really have any grievances or complaints, it’s more symbolic. Just like the rest of America, we’re tired of watching The Daily Show without writers. It’s just not funny. Maybe this action will spur some governmental pressure on Hollywood to get a deal done, so we can also actually get to see the Scrubs series finale.”
When asked how this would affect the Candidates in advance of Super Tuesday on February 5th, the PSA Head responded, “We hope this will not be too much of an inconvenience to them. We’re sympathetic to their situations and have given all the Republican and Democratic candidates a 2008 Oxford Dictionary, the New York Times Style Guide and taught them how to use the Thesaurus feature in Word, in preparation for our strike.”
The effect of the strike can already be seen in the Candidates’ public appearances. Just today, while addressing an outdoor rally in Syracuse, New York, Barack Obama appeared flustered and incoherent on stage, saying at one point,“Our Moment is Now. Me Black. Vote me now. Our Moment is Now. Ebony over Ivory. No harmony. You vote Obama. ” Hilary Clinton did not fare much better, as evidenced by her speech this afternoon to a packed stadium at Harvard University, in which she simply cried for 27 minutes, without pause, and then another 15 minutes during the Q and A session.
Without Speechwriters, Clinton Beefs up Crying Strategy
On the Republican side, political insiders reported that Mitt Romney stands to be the most affected by the strike. One political analyst commented, “Romney is going to be really challenged by this strike. The speechwriters at least did a good job of having him not come off as a religious nut. Now? Without the softening affects his speechwriters provided, he’s definitely coming off as uber-Mormon, which is not a good sign. Might as well stick a fork in him and call him Big Love if the strike drags on. Saying stuff like, ‘Polygamy is not such a bad thing… unless it’s same sex polygamy of course…then it’s just wrong. Like burn in Hell wrong”, might be a good platform to run a campaign on in parts of the Middle East, but it definitely won’t win him voters here, outside of Utah.”
One politician who is an unlikely casualty of the PSA strike, however, is President George Bush. Surprisingly, it was revealed today that Bush actually has been using a speechwriter during his terms as President . “Really?”, said one Senator, “Someone was actually writing for him? I just assumed that he had to be coming up with that stuff on his… I mean, really? Wow, I hope that guy can find work after the strike ends.”
Unfortunately, at the time we went to press, the Obama, Clinton, Romney and Bush Camps were unable to offer an official comment on the strike as their speechwriters were unavailable to craft it for them.
Posted on January 30th, 2008 by Jenne.
Categories: Philosophy & Spirituality, Storytelling.
A night of Bleary Reflection
After two bottles of wine, three tall glasses of Columbian rum, and 4 hours of conversation, I just couldn’t help but to begin a journey along a rant that may or may not have been trodden before.
I’d wrapped up a long Friday evening with a group from a perspective I have not had the pleasure of partaking in some time. Dharma has driven me gladly into the environment of intelligencia and academia after years of debauchery and the superficial; however, this night I’d come home, yet a tiny bit more adjusted than my former self in these circumstances.
The group was a bunch of very talented fashion photographers and an assortment of characters related to the industry. One a photographer for Abercrombie, one- a wild card from London (who’s shot some of the hottest models in the EU), and the other, a shooting star with a couple of covers under his belt- my good friend, who has been a mutual artistic companion and knows me as both muse and creator. Others at the soirée were a photographer’s assistant from Paris, his girlfriend, a model from LA and a makeup artist visiting Miami for a spell after two-year stint spanning New York, LA and Europe.
I preface this preface with the fact that I arrived in a state of mental disarray. I had a long week at my big girl job and was somehow agitated by the location of my friend’s new residence. It kept wearing on me but I eventually understood why I was flush with irritation. As I sipped Columbian rum from one of the balconies of this uber-modern, super chic, yet bare bones apartment I looked out onto another building and realized it was where I spent a most unpleasant evening. This triggered me down a rabbit hole onward into the (more…)
Posted on January 29th, 2008 by Myk.
Categories: Philosophy & Spirituality, History & Politics, Philanthropy & Environment, Science & Technology, Arts & Literature, Definitions.
Thinking about the perfect number of women to men at a party reminded me of this notion of the “golden ratio.” I know (random).
History and definition of the Golden Ratio
It was first written about by Euclid of Alexandria (ca. 300 BC) in the Elements, one of most influential mathematics textbook ever written. The ratio was derived when ”A straight line is said to have been cut in extreme and mean ratio when, as the whole line is to the greater segment, so is the greater to the lesser.” Actually, The Golden Ratio is based on Fibonacci Numbers, where every number in the sequence (after the second) is the sum of the previous 2 numbers: 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21, … it’s just math really.
The Ratio
Um huhh? But what IS it? The golden ratio can be expressed as a mathematical constant, usually denoted by the Greek letter (phi). OR, in figures, it is 1.61 : 1.
OK…why do we care?
Because it’s EVERYWHERE. And because it determines beauty. Beauty is really mathematics. Really. Faces are based on the ratio, as is archecture, and art, and seashells , and plantlife, and the Vitruvian Man (which is why he is known as the “perfectly proportioned man” and WE CHOSE his name for our nom du guerre).
Pretty cool though right?
Well, as this tangential post goes…you might want to know what the golden ratio has to do with the ideal ratio of women to men at a party. Not so much actually (hence the tangent). According to our years and years of experience that perfect (call it the Vitruvian) ratio lies somewhere between 1.1-1.5:1. To be more precise would require sophisiticated and very expensive tools. Our range will have to do.
Posted on January 29th, 2008 by Myk.
Categories: Philanthropy & Environment, Business & Finance, Science & Technology.
I just found an interesting blog by an enterepreneur. His eponymous bolog is called the Adeo Ressi Blog. We like him because in addtion to being a champion of entrepeneurs (he started www.thefunded.com), he’s on the board of the XPRIZE Foundation, the non-profit leading the charge for space exploration, and he addresses some of the same issues as us (the Tesla, the environment). Check it out.
Posted on January 26th, 2008 by Phil.
Categories: Media & Entertainment, Philosophy & Spirituality, Consumer Products, Arts & Literature, Humor & Pop Culture.
Music has a new face, an angel’s face. Christian hard rock band, ‘Hey, Where’s My Shoe?’ is redefining pop culture as we know it. Voted ‘God’s Favorite New Artist of the Year’ at the 2007 Evangelical Churches of America Music & Arts Conference, the group is taking crowds by storm from Virginia to Vatican City.
Appealing to both evangelical Christians and die hard atheists alike, Hey Where’s My Shoe is bridging the gaps between varied genres of music. “I’d say our main influences include Gospel, Heavy Metal, Deep House, and Chamber music mostly, but we’re really trying to bring in new sounds all the time”, said lead guitar player and Cordon Bleu chef ‘Christian’. “We want to create a new sound… something terrifying yet soothing at the same time.” Well they’ve succeeded. I haven’t heard anything this moving since P Diddy remixed Beethoven’s 9th with Britney Spears’s chart topper I’m a Slave For You.
Their first album, ‘Let Go, Let God’ has broken out of the Christian Rock charts, due primarily to the runaway success of its first hit single, a cover of ‘Shout at the Devil.’ That song is making its way up the pop charts, and as of this week, was in the #13 spot. Their second single ‘Agapé’, releases this week and expectations are high. The last Christian band to achieve this feat was Creed, with their hit songs ‘Higher’ and ‘Arms Wide Open.’ Music industry analysts are expecting Hey Where’s My Shoe to surpass Creed’s sales records in the very near future. The band is currently being courted by Sony BMG, Universal, EMI and Warner, but are holding out for stronger partners. “Right now God is our partner and front man.” Said lead signer ‘John’. “Why should we settle for less than our divine right?”
Fans are clamoring to get info on the band’s much anticipated world tour, scheduled to start sometime later this year. Dates and locations are being held under wraps for the time being. “We’re basically waiting for approval and blessing from the Pope before we settle on our tour plan”, said drummer and renowned tattoo artist ‘James.’ “He’s the main man in our world, so the shekel stops there.” Know for their religious fervor, the band takes the Pope’s word very seriously.
Making the band even more intriguing is the air of mystery that enshrouds them – nobody knows who the band members really are. Taking the names of apostles, the band members have never revealed their true identities. “Obvious is the new Subtle”, said mixmaster and reformed porn star John-Paul. “Our music speaks of chivalry, yet challenges the status quo.” We’re not sure what exactly that means, but we like it.
The Band:
Hey Where’s My Shoe?
John - Lead Vocals
Christian - Lead Guitar
James (the son of Alphaeus) - Drums
John-Paul - Keyboard/Turntables
Matthias - Bass Guitar/Backup Vocals
Judas - Symbols
The Album:
Let Go, Let God
The Songs:
Agapé
Ezekial 25:17
Shout at the Devil
Sermon on the Mount
On Your Knees
Catholic High School Girls
I Fought the Lord (and the Lord won)
Ave Maria (remix starring the Little Lights Children’s Choir)
Homos for Haggard
Jesus Stole my Trailer (and Replaced It with Salvation)
Angels in my Attic
A loyal fan at last week’s show in Grozny
Posted on January 25th, 2008 by Phil.
Categories: Business & Finance.
Societe Generale said unauthorized bets on stock index futures by a rogue trader caused a $7.2 billion trading loss, the largest in banking history. The man behind the magic, Jerome Kerviel is currently on the run. Kerviel’s approach was to balance real trades with fictitious ones. Apparently, his “intimate and perverse” knowledge of the bank’s controls allowed him to avoid detection.
“At first this seemed like a joke,” said Nicolas Rutsaert, an analyst covering European banks at Dexia in Brussels. “Then we realized nobody was laughing.” Societe Generale was known as a leader in derivatives and was considered one of the best risk managers in the world. So much for the opinion of the global finance community.
While Jerome has suddenly disappeared, and will be royally screwed when he’s found, you’ve got to admire his balls. Apparently he was seriously in the money in December, and all the losses happened in January. This guy makes Nick Leeson look like a punk. Nick only lost $1.4 billion for Barings. That’s small time baby.
Societe Generale started unwinding the trading positions on Jan. 21, a day when equity markets in France, Germany and the U.K. fell more than 5 percent. The next day the U.S. Federal Reserve cut interest rates by the most in 23 years, as financial market conditions continued to deteriorate. “It’s not possible that our covering operations contributed to the market’s fall,” said Philippe Collas, the head of asset management at the bank. Of course not, how could a fire sale to unwind deep losses contribute to already falling markets.
The trading loss wipes out two years of pretax profit at Societe Generale’s investment-banking unit, and trading in the bank’s shares has plummeted by almost 50%. The bank appears to be upset about this, but hey, what’s $7.2 billion between friends.
Posted on January 25th, 2008 by Phil.
Categories: History & Politics.
Here at VM we generally steer clear of politics, as it’s a slippery slope into endless debates, but every now and then we just can’t help ourselves. This little snippet of information was just too tempting for me to let slide.
According to a study by two nonprofit journalism groups, Bush and seven top officials — including Vice President Dick Cheney, former Secretary of State Colin Powell and then-National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice — made 935 false statements about Iraq during the two years following September 11, 2001.
The study was based on a searchable database compiled of primary sources, such as official government transcripts and speeches, and secondary sources - mainly quotes from major media organizations.
Time to make another 65 guys. Let’s make it an even thousand.
Posted on January 25th, 2008 by Phil.
Categories: Philanthropy & Environment.
Today, in the serenity of a small town nestled high in the Swiss Alps, Microsoft billionaire Bill Gates pledged over $300 million to develop farming in poor countries. The move was the first foray into agriculture by the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, and has been met with thunderous applause the world over.
In Gate’s words, “If we are serious about ending extreme hunger and poverty around the world, we must be serious about transforming agriculture for small farmers, most of whom are women.” Well done Bill.
Posted on January 23rd, 2008 by Myk.
Categories: Media & Entertainment, Travel & Leisure, Business & Finance, Science & Technology, Sports & Health.
I just learned yesterday about a new business model for an oooooold profession. Some say the oldest profession. I’m writing, of course, about prostitution.
Last night, over a few beers and talks about CRM, ERP, SQL (you know the usual) my buddy Mike tells me about this thing they’ve got going on in Prague–FREE prostitution. Huh? Free? Like you can walk in to the brothel and just get sex? Yep exactly (with a few minor catches). You have to become a porn star–you have to let them film you in the act.
I found a Bloomberg article on the subject. A brothel (paid sex is legal in Czech) called Big Sister has applied the reality TV model to whoring, creating a “reality sex” concept, going after the Youporn crowd. It’s a pretty good deal for both the actors and the voyeurs, so it seems. From the article:
Since 2005, more than 15,000 men have taken up the offer of free sex in return for 15 minutes, or less, of fame, according to the brothel. Big Sister is now expanding into the U.S. with a local version of its Web site.
Visitors to the virtual brothel pay 29.95 euros ($43.88) for a one-month subscription to a smorgasbord of sex listed by position, preference and number of people. Big Sister also produces cable TV shows that air on Sky Italia and the U.K.’s Television X, as well as DVDs such as “Sex Hyenas” and “Voyeur’s Eye.”
Of the women who who work at the brothel, 3/4 come from the Czech Republic and Slovakia, and they make 3,000 to 5,000 euros a month, Borowitz says. Average wages in the Czech Republic are about 800 euros a month. So it’s tough to pull the exploitation card for critics.
According to the company, this is National Geographic for adults. I think it’s fascinating. Coming from a background of building/searching for new business models, this one looks solid. Venture-backable I would even say…if they had the balls that is. In any case I can’t wait for Wharton or Harvard publications to pick THIS one up.
Apart from my professional interest…ahem…I’m really curious what happens when more people find out about this. Prague is at least as beautiful as Amdam (having spent a fair amount of time in each) and if the sex is free…well tourism patterns just might change. My assessment–Prague1: Amsterdam 0.
Posted on January 21st, 2008 by Raj.
Categories: Media & Entertainment, Humor & Pop Culture.
One of our very first contributors, Raj, has taken up investigative journalism on his own blog Unfit2Print. Here I’ve republished a fascinating article from his site:
The Church of Scientology held a press conference yesterday to formally cut ties with Tom Cruise. The prepared statement read in part, “After much careful deliberation, we have decided that it is best for all parties concerned that Tom no longer be affiliated with the Church. This is not a decision we took lightly, but in light of many factors, including his recent lackluster box office performance and the ‘ickiness’ of his relationship with Katie Holmes, we thought this was the most prudent action. That, and frankly, he’s a little out there even for us, and that’s saying a lot.”
When asked if there was any one particular incident that drove the Church of Scientology to take this drastic action, a spokesperson commented, “It wasn’t one thing really. Even before the Oprah jumping up and down on the couch episode we started to wonder if Tom was really the type of high profile person we wanted to represent the Church. We’re trying to be taken seriously as a religion and having Tom as a public spokesperson has been, well, disastrous. I mean, there are ways to defend your religion in public and ways not to. Saying, ‘Some people, well, if they don’t like Scientology, well, then F-you. Really. F-you. Period.’, is not a scholastic rebuttal we as a Church endorse. ”
The Church, founded by author L. Ron Hubbard over 50 years ago, is used to controversy and mocking, but apparently draws the line at pint-sized movie stars who claim to know more than some of the worlds greatest minds. A high ranking member of the Church told us, “Discrediting Freud and Kinsey? I’m no medical genius but psychiatry and what-not have been around for a little longer than our Church I think. And saying giving a kid Ritalin is akin to giving them Cocaine? Whoa. Hold your horses. My kid has a little ADD and when he gets in one of his hyperactive moods, I admit, I slip him a little Ritalin to focus him…and yes maybe a little Nyquil in his milk to knock him out so I can have 20 minutes of peace in my day…but the point is, who is he to knock 200 years of medicine? He hasn’t even played a doctor in a movie as far as I can tell. Now, maybe if it was George Clooney, people would take him seriously, because of his longstanding role on ER, or even the guy from Scrubs, but Tom Cruise? That’s stretching it. ”
Martha McLoskey, a devout Scientology follower, agrees with her Church’s decision. “I can handle John Travolta and even Katie Holmes to an extent, but I cringe every time I go to TMZ and see Tom has done something stupid again in the name of Scientology. Most of us are just regular people. We practice medicine without a license and perform the odd ritual sacrifice just like any cult…um, I mean, religion.” The Scientology spokesperson went on to say that severing ties with Cruise was mandated by the Church’s Disconnection Policy, which, in his words states that, “members are encouraged to cut off all contact with friends or family members considered annoying or ballistic”. When we corrected him and let him know the actual Scientology texts say Disconnection applied to “friends and family members considered antagonistic”, not “annoying and ballistic”, the spokesperson retorted, “Whatever. Our Church was started by a Sci-Fi writer. And not even Asimov or Orwell.”
One reporter pushed this point, questioning whether Scientology was actually a religion or more of a pyramid scheme like Amway. The spokesperson responded, “We’re nothing like a pyramid scheme. We pay our members for bringing in other people to the Church and the more members they bring in, the more money they, and the church make. Does that sound like a pyramid scheme to you?” When told that this was, in fact, the accepted definition of a pyramid scheme, the spokesperson abruptly changed the topic back to Cruise, saying, “In the end, the values of the Church and Tom were just diverging. It was one thing to put up with him making us watch ‘Days of Thunder’ over and over again when he had a high Q rating, but now? I don’t think so. And then we heard he had been seen lunching with Mel Gibson. That was the last straw. We have enough bad press already and the last thing we need is all the Jews breathing down our necks.”
